January 2012
1 tag
Off the fucking chain: How to be Dean Winchester,... →
sunnyxstars:
kittykazoo13:
Step 1: Be an average pretty boy with green eyes, light brown hair and freckles.
I have dark brown hair that looks lighter because this picture is washed out, and my eyes are actually more grey than green, but who is keeping score.
Step 2: Have…
1 tag
December 2011
blainefasa:
when he was a young warthog
WHEN I WAS A YOUNG WARTHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOG
tourist: could you give us directions to Olive Garden?
new yorker: no, but i could give you directions to an actual Italian restaurant lol
tourist: oh you think you're clever???
new yorker: what
tourist: i'm going to meet my dying niece and she happens to love olive garden so her whole family is going to eat with her so she'll have a few moments of happiness
new yorker: oh... oh god i'm so sor
tourist: no shut the fuck up you piece of shit. i'll find it myself
the tourist drives off and the new yorker is left to think about his life choices and his decision to be a giant condescending asshole
1 tag
happy birthday to me
Things saying “it is my birthday.” have gotten me today
Not having to sing in English class
Not getting yelled at by my chinese teacher for no homework
Not getting yelled at by my cello teacher for no practice
A candy cane
A cookie
Cutting in line
A yellow pages
A latte
An italian soda
“Eisenberg glibly and quickly pretends not to see all of this [fame] as opening...”
– (via jesseeisenbergandthecats)
#BUT HOW DO YOU EXIST.
(via 7spanishangels)
1 tag
1 tag
a sad storee
raphmike:
1 tag
Watchlyfeunscriptd:
2 tags
“Nope, instead there are absolutely, positively, unquestionably zero consequences...”
– Dorothy Snarker (via ahandsomeshark)
November 2011
2 tags
I talk to girls good.
Attractive Eb Games Employee: How are you?
Jayden: Yeah, I'm just looking.
Attractive Eb Games Employee: No, I said how are you.
Jayden: I realized that half way through but kept going and hoped you wouldn't notice.